Thursday, April 21, 2016


I changed my mind about this performance until the moment that I started- which seems to be a trend for me. I was struggling with the idea of being naked in front of everyone in class completely sober... but knew that I wanted to do it because it would be therapeutic for me (more on this in a bit).

I had played with the idea of glueing googley eyes to my body hair, mostly thinking about the video that would follow the live performance, but decided to do this instead. I was happy that I chose to set up in front of the window, because I think that it provided the best light for the tone I was trying to create, and reflected off of the glitter well. I wish I would have had some kind of gooey substance to rub myself down with first so that the glitter would have stayed on better- I realized this during the performance and was annoyed with myself for not paying attention to detail. 

I had also thought about the idea of going through my morning routine from high school in front of the mirrors- stepping on and off of a scale in eight different outfits, spinning and squishing and taking pictures of every little imperfection for hours before school. 

I had a pretty severe eating disorder during those days. I won't mention numbers because I don't want to trigger anyone, but it was severe. I had also thought about using paint or the red glitter as a hint to the self harm that happened during those days... I don't know if I want to continue to create art about this though.

I liked that people interpreted the performance as self love. I like that interpretation much better than what I had intended to convey. I think I will change a lot of things for the video performance- it may end up being completely different. 


  1. Jessica -- glad you told us this story - so glad that a lot of us believed what we were witnessing was self- love not hate.
    And the glitter - red - added to this - as when you think of love, you think of red. Red hearts, red roses. The scales - and weighing yourself with various outfits -- wow... what an image that formed in my mind. i think other than the glitter not adhering as you would have liked was the only issue - but what I did like was it falling....slowly, sparkly...onto the floor in a big pile.... that was beautiful.

  2. WOW that performance was so powerful both for the audience and for you. Hearing how the performance was supposed to be interpreted as was very informative and definitely challenges what I got from the experience. I felt that you had some angst about your body at first but as you put the glitter on you were transforming your mind, spirit, body into loving yourself. Although it might have started with self hate I felt like in the end you learned to love your body and were highlighting that with the red glitter.

    I agree with Sandy on the color choice of red not reflecting your inner turmoil, as red really is associated with love,passion sex etc. Perhaps if you want to keep the glitter aspect and reflect more of the self-hate you were feeling change the color. Maybe look up different color meanings and go with the one that you feel most resembles your state of mind. Perhaps even black glitter would be helpful. You could even just change the substance you're using to cover your body something thicker? Whatever you decide to use in your video i’m sure it will be just as powerful performance as the first one.

    I agree with you that the natural light complimented you and your actions very nicely, I think the harsh spot lights would not have framed your idea as well. I couldn't tell at all that this was a last minute thing, you set up your performance so well and executed with little mistakes that it felt like this was your plan from the beginning. Although you had to get water to try and make the glitter stick, the fact that the sink was so close didn't disturb your performance. I thought this performance was beautiful and very powerful no matter how it's interpreted, i am so glad i was able to be there for it.

  3. I really loved this piece. Having insecurities about our bodies is something we all face in the mirror everyday, but you almost celebrated the things we usually turn away from or grimace at. By rubbing that vibrant glitter all over the spots on your body that you scrutinize, we were not only able to see what bothers you, but our focus was solely on those parts. The fact that you went nude for this piece too was stunning. That takes a lot, not only to be naked in front of the class, accentuating every part of your body with glitter, but to do so in front of mirrors. It felt very voyeuristic to me. I felt like we as an audience were invading in a personal moment you were having with yourself. I loved that you were unaware of us and kept character the entire time. I would say just have more glitter next time, and have water ready so it sticks! This was a really strong piece and I really enjoyed the me it was that we might not always be happy with what we've got, but we are who we are, mind, body and soul, and every part of us is beautiful, and that is something that we don't need anyone to tell us, we are who we are, and we are beautiful as we are.